Celtic vs LASK Recap & IndyCar Markham Chaos: Episode 178

And it's lights out and away we go!

Podcasting from somewhere near Akron, Ohio.

Bringing you all the latest talk in motorsport and soccer, this is Tackling the Chicane.

Okay, here we go.

So enjoying, uh, some new advances to the, uh, old soundboard here. We're gonna try to run with, uh, some bed music, uh, that's been, um, copied to the soundboard, so it'll be the same for a while. Just, I think it's easier than trying to find unlicensed music. I know, what was the, uh surprise soundbite, or are you saving that? Well, do you really want to hear it, or do you want to— well, is there a use for it that you were like saving it for?

Well, I, I mean, I kind of want to hear it.

Okay, we'll definitely have a lot of use for that. The Price Is Right fail. Yeah, keep that one queued because I think we'll have a excuse to use that in about also 5 minutes. I also got this one because I think it, it's fitting to a specific F1 team.

Well, so my guess would be Mercedes, but you have a hate boner for a lot of teams, so that could— no, you're— that's a— that's my ode to Toto Wolff. Okay, in case we need to do an ode to Total Wolf. Yeah, I mean, it's certainly fitting. Yeah, I have, uh, let's see, 2, 4, 6, 8— I have 9 more slots, so more effects and music to come, uh, and it only makes the show better. We're gonna sound like, uh, Crazy Ira and the Deuce here soon.

Yeah, that's, uh, we'll try to keep— not cross the line, but Um, there is Crazy Ira and the Douche. There's something to be said for, uh, that parody of morning, uh, radio because it still exists today. Yeah, it's like the thing keeping radio alive, really. Yeah, it's, it's quite funny. If you haven't seen the Parks and Rec episode with Crazy Ira and the Douche, go ahead and just look it up on your any streaming service, and I think you will not be disappointed.

Yeah, so, uh, well, that was fun. Yeah, those were definitely good sound bites. And like I said, keep the Price is Right one queued up because I think in about a minute here we're gonna have an excuse to use it. But today on the show, it's, it's a packed agenda. Um, little recording scheduling issues, uh, for one reason or another, but we should be kind of back into the Well, this will come out on a Wednesday night technically, but we'll be back on our normal Thursday, uh, cadence, I think, for the foreseeable future.

Uh, but on this show, IndyCar and Markham, F1 preview in the Netherlands as they are back from summer break, and then we have a whole gaggle of soccer to talk about. We've got Scottish League Cup round 2 to discuss and some interesting results there and some interesting draws in the 3rd round of said competition, the quarterfinals, which we will discuss. Celtic and their Champions League qualification campaign kicked off tonight and I'll just say it right now. A fantastic performance from Celtic. So we'll discuss that.

And we will also do sort of an abridged preview of the Premier League, some teams to keep an eye out on, maybe some teams that I'm tipping for relegation, all that good stuff. And as promised in the last episode, We each are selecting second teams to follow in the Scottish Premiership and the, I believe, the Premier League as well. Um, so we will unveil those. Yeah. And I have questions and questions and questions, um, on a few different topics.

First of all, not so much the one team in the Scottish Premier League that I chose, but possibly um, in the Premier League, you could give me a little bit of— because, well, we'll get into that. I have a reason for choosing each team, but we'll talk about that, uh, during that segment. All right, well, we should get into business. Let's fire it up with, um, an IndyCar weekend in Markham, Ontario, uh, which replaces Toronto on the schedule, and I don't— hopefully not for that long. Spoiler alert to my feelings on this race.

But, um, yeah, Markham, Ontario street race seemed a little strewn together, strung together. Good crowd, I'll give it that. Yeah, okay, so IndyCar, here's what you can't do. Do not put a hairpin turn on a road course in— on the city streets that is going to cause a caution every 4 laps or every green flag that flies. And look, you'll have to look up the, the map if you want to, listening people.

This, this thing was not negotiable. It was not a negotiable turn, at least in Monte Carlo where they had the fountain. There seems to be at least some room there, a little bit. I mean, it's similar turns, but it's not coming in— you— in, in, uh, Monaco, it's not coming in at such high speeds. And the radius was so short and sharp.

They tried to make this giant elephant ear runoff area. Yeah, which— who's gonna take that? No one. Yeah, this was IndyCar Um, yeah, a horrible race. I didn't finish it on purpose.

I finished it just because I wanted to see what, what happened. But yeah, they were trying to— the broadcasters were trying to paint it as, um, you know, intriguing and, oh my gosh, look how challenging this course is. And it's like, no, you put a dead end on the on the one straight that has a 90-degree turn that no one could negotiate. And when they did negotiate it, they crashed into each other. Yeah, I think some of that is the broadcasters are never gonna say like, of course, terrible.

So I, I think they were working with what they had, which was a piece of shit track. But, um, 2 things that I, I think were interesting from the weekend. One Palo didn't win and actually didn't do very well at all, crashed in qualifying. Marcus Ericsson gets his first win in the IndyCar Series for 3 years, um, so, and seemingly saved his seat at Andretti in, in the process. We also had Louie Foster on pole, and he was in a position to win for about half the race until he had a pretty spectacular shunt into the wall that had maybe the best Will Buxton soundbite we've gotten in his time as lead, lead broadcaster of IndyCar.

Yeah, I don't remember where he— it was essentially something like, uh, and Foster gets around. Oh no, because he gets around and boom, just smashes into the wall. There was a particular portion of this course where that section of the wall sort of jutted out. Yeah. So if you were taking the apex, trying to go the best way around, that knob of the wall was right there, and everybody was getting as close to that as they could in inches.

And if you, if you mistimed it, by an inch, you were tearing up your, your right front. I mean, you were hitting your right, right front suspension, tearing that up. And then the result of the glance off of the— of what I'll call that knob is you were headed right to the wall adjacent to your left. And that— they— 2, 2 guys tore up their cars doing that, including one, uh, Mick Schumacher. Correct.

So yeah, I, I sympathize for Louie Foster because I think he, he really had a good race. Yeah, I mean, he had a chance to at least be on the podium, which would have been his best result in IndyCar. Uh, so it was interesting in a couple of aspects, you know, having a guy like Louie Foster be leading a lot of laps and getting the pole And Marcus Ericsson is a winner we haven't seen in quite a while in the series.

Um, track terrible, I think, is in, you know. Yeah, that's just the way it had to be. That's what happens. I'm not taking— I'm not shitting on IndyCar. They're, they're, they are sort of trying to pioneer this series.

They're going to run on streets, that's great. Some of the courses aren't going to be fantastic. Yeah, um, if they just somehow could have figured out a way to either have a negotiable hairpin or, or maybe figure out a way to, to run the course differently that you didn't have that at all, because it was a long, fairly long straight Uh, heartbreaking. Then no room. Yeah, if cars were side by side, there was literally— they stacked up like dominoes.

I, I, I'm willing to give them the benefit of the doubt because Markham, I think— well, it was at least a contingency plan because they run in the streets of Toronto, uh, before, and they— for so— I can't remember, but there is a reason why they had to go to Markham, so it's kind of a placeholder Bullshit street course. Yeah. So here's what I was talking about. Mark Eriksson third, Louis Foster up four places from the restart sits fourth, and Foster makes the move on Eriksson. There you go.

Oh no! He's in the wall. He overcooked Eriksson. There you go. Oh no!

He sits fourth, and Foster makes the move on Eriksson. There you go. Oh no! I I remember seeing the clip on Instagram because I Part of my problem was I knew who won before I watched, which takes some jeopardy out of it. But I saw that on Instagram and I was like, that is fucking hilarious.

That is, uh, a nice feature there. Perhaps we can bring in some more sound bites for certain things that we're watching here. Um, yeah, nice. Louis Foster led the most laps in this race at 32. Um, Unfortunately did not finish.

Um, Romain Grosjean. Yeah, second place, 28 laps in second place. I was just begging for him not to win because I don't really care for— yes, I, I like Dale Coyne racing in a small team, but that would have been cool. Um, he has something like 6 second-place finishes in IndyCar with no wins. And Palou finished 4th, but in, you know, the commentary box fashion of IndyCar, they mentioned Palou 17,000 times.

Well, he's going to be your champion. So yeah, I get it. That's fine. I mean, we, we've had other dominant champions in the past. I think AJ Foyt leads the number of championships with 7.

Um, so there was a time when Foyt was dominant. There was a time when other drivers were dominant. Um, you're gonna have that. But I still— and I hope I'm not— I don't want to harp on this point, but man, has this series really come alive in like the last 2 or 3 campaigns. Well, they finally kind of nailed the schedule.

Um, Markham, you know, is what it is. Not great. We've seen some pretty bad street races from IndyCar before. This doesn't really even rank in probably the top 5 worst street races they've ever been. Um, but they've kind of dialed in the schedule.

18 races, no giant gaps anymore. They go to interesting places. They did— I think Phoenix, which they're going back, was a success with NASCAR. Um, maybe kind of a little bit segues into the next point here, but we'll see what this Freedom 250 brings, which is a one-off. Yeah.

Um, but yeah, Marcus Ericsson wins, that's great. Palou is still going to be your champion pretty much no matter what at this point. Um, there hasn't really been any jeopardy in terms of who's going to win the championship since Oh, April, and even then not really. Yeah, this, this course, um, not super cool. I mean, I don't know, we'll see what, what transpires here.

It's basically sort of a square with, uh, a, some jutting out. There is a couple of good straights. Um, that's where we see a lot of competitive passing. So I'm gonna hold— I'm gonna hope that it's decent. Um, it's 147 laps because it's tiny.

Yeah, it's, it's not— I don't know, it's a tiny course. Yeah, what— let's see here, 1.7. Yeah, that's tiny. Yeah, so it'll be interesting to see how things play out. Practice is, uh, Saturday with qualifying in the afternoon, and then Sunday the race, uh, kicks off at 1 PM.

So all eyes on that. Um, I will have to watch it delayed, I'm sure. That broadcast— I'm— this will be the one thing I say— is going to be nearly unwatchable. Uh, just from a perspective of where they're racing and when they are racing said event, it's going to be unwatchable. There's going to be quite a bit of pomp and circumstance under the, you know, the, the 250th anniversary of the USA, which that's all fine and good.

Um, there's going to be some politico involved, I'm sure. Possibly, you know, a low flyby by some, uh, aircraft of some sort. I don't— I, I'm sure it's gonna be— it's gonna be rough. It's gonna be pretty tough sledding. It's gonna be a lot.

It's, it's gonna be a lot. Um, of course, this race was the brainchild of, uh, one Mr. Roger Penske, who has been trying to put something like this together for quite some time, even though the consensus on this podcast is that it might have been quickly figured out how to turn Washington, D.C. into a race circuit. But there's been talk for a long time. This is basically an ego fest between Roger Penske and someone else. Uh, well, it's, you know, the president of— the current president of this United States.

Um, and yeah, I— all I'm gonna say is I don't, I don't care for the bleeding of super politics into any, any sporting event, any motor, motorsports, soccer, whatever have you. Um, yeah, you can make your— get your box Take your camera pans, but I think it's going to be a little bit more than that. Yeah, in this one. So yeah, uh, we'll see. It'll be interesting nonetheless.

Uh, I'm sure we'll have commentary, uh, following this race up. But yeah, so IndyCar is going to Washington, D.C. for the Freedom 250. All right, well, all we can do now is watch, so Um, let's see what happens there. We have a race in, I believe, the Netherlands for Formula 1, back from the summer break, back from what feels like the 15th break of this season already. Um, where we left off, it looked like McLaren had maybe found some pace.

Lando Norris took a race win, and generally McLaren just looked a lot better, um, to put it bluntly, than they did at the beginning of the season. And maybe some overall just more competition. Um, we have talked to death at this point about how the racing isn't great and the current regulations, engine regs, are pretty fucked. Did you get a chance to watch that? I did watch the super clipping, which— so That's been like the buzzword.

That's a good follow on YouTube, F1 Fanatic. Um, sometimes he gets a little deep, but this— that particular clip that I sent you explained a lot to me about how these cars are set up. And when we, when we watch a race in F1, unfortunately the commentary and the telemetry is very limited. So you do have telemetry, but we don't— the commentators and the telemetry don't show you the, this super clipping, right, deal. So I will take that a step further.

They do that on purpose this year. They've been doing that on purpose because they don't want to show a car slowing down on a straight. Uh, they could watch a qualifying session especially, they'll cut away. I'll try to— I'll try to explain it quickly.

Watch F1 Fanatic, the super clipping, uh, piece. It's about 10 minutes long, but it makes a ton of sense. Watch it if you haven't. If you're an F1 fan, please watch this. Basically, the driver has no control over the braking that happens vis-à-vis the MGU, the power unit that is harvesting energy.

And at some points during the race, the car will just slow down. Yeah, not by the driver's command or decision, it just happens. And it was fascinating to watch that 10-minute clip, um, because it, it, it made sense now Because you, you could be watching a race on TV and you're like, what the hell is that guy doing? Well, he's, he's driving the car and the car is doing whatever the car wants to do. Yeah.

So I, I thought that was— I would implore any F1 fan to check that clip out. I think it's going to make a lot of sense to everybody. It's exactly why, in better words, we have been saying that the series has kind of hit the shitter a little this year. I think they're gonna have to make— well, it, you know, in that video, uh, said even that they will rely less on electric power. It will not be a 50/50 split next year, something like 58 to 42 or something like that.

They're gonna try to ratchet, dial it back a little. So it'll be 58-42, then they're gonna try to get somewhere in— probably back to where they just fucking were, you know. In my opinion, the best thing that could happen— and here's why it won't— because engine manufacturers and teams are relying on hybrid technology because that's where, where everything is headed on the street. And we all know that race teams take tech technology that they learn on the track and they try to divvy it out to road, road cars. That's why Honda's so invested in hybrid technology.

Yeah, Chevrolet, kind of, possibly. Um, but yeah, they're not going to take it away completely because it doesn't do them any monetary good to do so. What I would like to see is a naturally aspirated V10. Well, the V10, you can kiss that goodbye. Yeah, I'm just— I'm waxing— I know the V10 has been dead for 20 years, unfortunately.

I know, but that was, that was some of the greatest, you know, greatest from a spectator standpoint racing that that I've ever seen. Uh, and as you said, albeit 20 years ago. So if they can just get to a point where the driver has a little bit more control over what the car is doing— yeah, I would like it to be total control. Yeah, but I don't know, it immensely screwed the pooch, I think. And they kind of realized it now.

Took a while. Um, but last year drivers were saying in sims this car is underpowered and does stupid things. So it's like, why— here we are over a year later talking about it. So yeah, I guess better late than never. Well, and we'll continue to talk about it if it doesn't improve.

Uh, but now I have a different lens to look through for F1 races. And I'll be watching for if, as you said, the broadcast is largely censored when stuff like that happens, I think. So we'll just have to keep a keen eye on this setup for the rest of the year. This is a sprint weekend. So the sprint race is on the 22nd of August.

Uh, qualifying also the 22nd, which I believe is Saturday, and then the race at 0900, um, on Sunday. So yeah, we'll keep a close eye on that, see what happens. Uh, I don't know, probably don't really need to dip into where we're at here. I think everybody knows. So nope, I think that'll do it.

In terms of racing. Uh, we have, like I said, kind of a shitload of soccer to talk about because it's in full swing now, or about to be in full swing in terms of this podcast. So big-time shift of gears here, and we're going to start in the, the land up north in Scotland. And it was a League Cup weekend, so no league action to talk about second round of the League Cup when all the big boys come to play. You have a group stage early in July where you get some lower-level opposition, and some of them filter through, like in the first match we'll talk about, uh, Kilmarnock Air United.

Um, but we had some pretty interesting results in this first round, including, uh, Championship side And newly promoted championship side Stenhousemuir taking down Motherwell 1-0. Rangers thrashed St. Mirren 5-1. And you have something to say? Well, I, I have a little bit of confusion. Okay, so, um, Ayr United, when I look at the table— yeah, they're not there because They are in the second tier.

They're in the championship. Okay, so I tried to go on Fotmob and, and figure out where does that second tier live. You would have to search championship and then even that, or, or Scotland championship. They're in the same league though, right? No, no.

So they're in the second tier. Second tier league. Yeah, but they occasionally get to play first tier in Cups if they get drawn. Okay. Yeah, I'm trying to sort all this out.

Yeah. Um, with that being said, so let me put it this way. You know how teams get relegated, right? This is where they would go. Okay.

So they— Air United live in the land of teams that get relegated. 6 relegated teams. No, no, no, no, no. Oh, there's one automatic relegated team and then the 11th place team goes in a playoff.

Uh, 3. So when you, when you get relegated down, yeah, how many teams are, are facing each other? So in Scotland, the top flight is 12 teams and then 2nd, 3rd, and 4th tier are 10. Primary league is 20 teams and then second, third, and fourth are 24 teams. So split between second, third, and fourth leagues are X number of teams.

Yeah. So it'd be 30 in Scotland and— And do those teams play each other? No. Or no? No.

It's their own tiers, their own leagues. You stay in the tier. It's a pyramid. Yeah. Okay.

You still, Ayr United, if they win the second tier, go up. Whoever finishes bottom in the Premiership this year goes down. In the Premier League, it's 3 teams and then 3 teams come up. Um, but this is the League Cup, so different tournament. You get drawn, literally, like we're talking balls here.

Okay, get drawn and matchups are— okay, thus created. Well, great system, right? Yeah. So these League Cup games now have become more interesting to someone like me who's 4 years into watching this but still trying to figure it out. And I don't think I'm alone.

Yeah, um, it's confusing a bit. But Ayr United, uh, they looked pretty scrappy at first, right? Yeah, I mean, it kind of looked like they maybe were gonna steal a win. First off, this is at Kilmarnock. Second off, this is actually a derby.

This is an Ayrshire derby, which is a region in more western Scotland. Um, so this is technically a rivalry here. Well, not technically, it is, which is why you saw a shitload of Ayr United away fans there and a full stadium. We watched Celtic take on Kilmarnock in the league last week and there was like no one there. Yeah.

And And then this one was close to a full house Friday night, cup match against a rival, makes sense. Um, but yeah, Ayr United I think really made a, a good impression. Um, and I, I thought for a second maybe we're gonna steal the whole thing. It felt like it. I mean, 5th minute, right, right off the bat, Ayr United goal from Owen Steerton, uh, makes it 1-0, and that lifts the crowd, right?

Yeah. Um, they continue to shoot through the 13th minute of this game, several, um, really hot shots, uh, against Kilmarnock. Um, we go from 13th to 42nd minute. Um, John Jewels, your guy, seemingly becoming your guy. It's going to come out later, I think.

Um, To Hoagall. Is it Hugo? Hugo. Hugo. Sorry, it's hard when I watch these games.

The accent is a bit thick. Yeah, Joe Hugo. Right. So equalize in the 42nd. 3 minutes of stoppage.

Nothing happens. Halftime. Maybe a few things happen, but nothing of any note here. Um, and then in the second half, 48th minute, Ross Taylor with a, a rocket, just a nice, really nice goal, uh, makes it 2-1 Air United. And that's where, as you said, uh, I think you're, you're kind of going, okay, is this team gonna come in?

Felt like we had a cup set on our, yeah, our hands. Um, and really, Ayr United are probably— will end up in the top end of the Championship and maybe vying for promotion via the playoffs, I would imagine. There's not a huge gap between Kilmarnock and Ayr United, so it's not that crazy. You put a Championship team in England against most Premier League sides, they're gonna struggle quite a bit. So that's what's kind of nice about Scotland is the gap isn't so crazy and you can get quite a few upsets in the cup.

Um, and yeah, thought that was gonna happen. Um, but then it— let's say I would, I would say the wheels kind of fell off a bit. United kept the lead for over 30 minutes though. Yeah, I think Kilmarnock had possession in this game. Um, but we know that that doesn't— 68%.

Yeah, necessarily transmit a win at all times. Uh, near goal in the 69th for Killea, but not, uh, not to be. 79th minute, Larson for Kilmarnock shoots the equalizer, 2-2. And I mean, now we're at, you know, 11 minutes left to play. Yeah, and it would have gone into, um, extra time.

Yeah, exciting match to watch for sure. Just 10 minutes later, and I'm gonna try this— Klasenko? That works for me. I don't know exactly how to say it, but Yeah, this was a disaster from the Aire United goalkeeper who spills across and then, yeah, gets punished. Had the ball.

Yeah, uh, if he could have just tucked it. Yep. Uh, but he fumbles a bit and Krasenko was there, shoots, scores 3-2 Kilmarnock, which will be our, uh, our final. But, um, Yeah, I thought it was— I thought it was a great match. Yeah, really fun match Friday night under the lights.

Uh, big, big crowd, big away end, good atmosphere. Ayrshire Derby, first one in like 4 years, um, because they haven't played in the same league in a— in that period of time. Um, so yeah, really good cup match, which is what you want to see. Uh, Ayr United really going for it despite the fact that they were probably decently heavy underdogs. Um, but it was nice to see some upsets in the League Cup.

Um, none involving Celtic, it's fair to say. Um, away to Dundee United, this one a little pretty straightforward, I would say, in terms of Um, a Celtic win 4-0. I texted you today, and admittedly this was before things started really going good for Celtic, but I, I said that the defense was shocking, and I still kind of am on that train a little bit. 4-0 for Celtic in this match against Dundee United, but I'm sure you noted Dundee United hit the post about 5 times. Yeah, there's a rat— there's quite a few rattlers.

Yeah. Uh, and it, it was the post and also the top beam. Yeah, several times. Um, second, within 15 minutes of this match, they had 2 rattlers. Yeah.

Um, so Dundee was there to, um, they were there to play. It was clear that they were there to play. Um, again, I thought this was a great match. 22nd minute off of a corner set, uh, Nygren to Trustee, header. Yeah, really nice header.

Puts us up to, uh, 1-0 Celtic.

Next goal, and I think you'll expand on this a bit, um, Camilo Durán is gonna be somebody to watch. Uh, yeah, yeah. Reminds me a bit of like a Kyogo-esque— I could see that a bit. I mean, dynamic, very pacey, quick, quick feet, has good vision, kind of, uh, seemingly a howitzer of a left foot, which we have more information than from this game, but really excited to see him get off and running. He actually doesn't even prefer to play on the wing, by the way.

He likes to be a center forward, but that's where Casper Hu is playing, who we spent a bunch of big money on. We spent a decent amount on Durán too, but, uh, yeah, good to see him get up and running, and we will certainly expound upon Camilo Durán. So I think that That's a good thing though, to have 2 dynamic players in that position. Yeah, because now we can share opportunities, share goals. And I think we haven't heard the last of Hugh.

No, certainly not. No, but if the 2 of them can dynamically lift this team— and we've, we've needed somebody there. Yeah, for a while. Last year we played most of the year without really a true starting center forward. Remember, it rotates between like Kelechi Iheanacho and Thomas Fontura and Callum Osmund and Johnny Kenny and about a million people, uh, because we hadn't found a replacement for Kyogo.

Seems like maybe we got that. Uh, we won't talk about it in depth here, but Kasper Hu scores a hat trick against Kilmarnock in 35 minutes. In, uh, which was impressive. But yeah, I think Duran looks really special, and again, more evidence to suggest that tonight from the Champions League qualifier. But, um, yeah, pretty straightforward.

Dundee United hit the post 5 times, so maybe could have looked a little differently. And there's some defensive frailty that worries me, but, uh, we saw Sebastian Tenecte get on the scoreboard for the first time in a long time. And I hope— yeah, good goal. I hope he kind of finds his footing this year. Let's be honest, didn't really, uh, light my socks on fire last year by any means.

No. Um, let me sidebar here.

As you know, I'm what I call a hyper observant. Okay. Of things that are going on off the pitch. I think I know where this is going, but continue. Dundee United has a sponsor in the left corner.

Okay, this is not where I thought it was going. Shite Shifters. Yeah, yeah. Okay, I, I saw— yeah, they do. So I— well, I was at the bar for this, so I didn't have the best view.

But I watched the league opener was Dundee United versus Rangers and saw that they had a sponsor called Shite Shifter and it went viral on Twitter. Of course. Shite Shifters, which is like a septic tank business. Yeah. That's a hell of a name for a business.

We have the Turd Buster here. We do. What I'm trying to— Larry the Turdbuster. Larry the Turdbuster. Yeah.

Has his— so which one do you like better? Larry the Turdbuster or should— well, it's pretty hard to beat Shite Shifters. Okay. So listeners, here's— huge sidebar here. Somewhere near Akron, Ohio.

Yeah. There is a one-man operation that's been, well, since we moved up here and probably way before that. Yeah. Larry the Turd Buster. Yeah, who also is a septic guy but has a pretty famous, um, what, uh, graphic on the side of his truck that is rather large, a rather large turd with the Ghostbusters.

It's, it sort of pays homage to the Ghostbusters logo. So yeah, Larry, uh, I've never met the guy. I heard he's really nice. Dude. So how long into this match did it take for you to see shite shifters?

As soon as they went down to the other end. Okay. And I actually, I paused it and stopped it and I was like, am I seeing this? Yeah. So shite shifters, more power to you.

Apparently there's a need for that in Scotland as there is here. Well, everyone shits, right? Yeah. If I can get a t-shirt or something, I mean, it would be great. I'll have to look into that.

Um, so, uh, I guess getting back into this match, uh, and I'll put a bow on it here because really it was pretty straightforward. Um, Benjamin Negren is now scoring what I am calling his contractually obligated 1 goal per game. This is a guy who many fans were not very high on last year despite the fact that he scored the most goals of anyone on the team. Well, he's scoring again every game and playing very well, especially tonight. Um, and the tide has kind of turned on this guy, it seems like, in, in Celtic fandom, where he's, you know, we thought maybe he was leaving over the summer, getting a move.

He played at the World Cup with Sweden. Benjamin Nygren, 2 assists and a goal in this one. Um, I think he is suddenly undroppable. He's kind of like the first name I'd put on the team sheet at this point. Well, you can't argue that.

Um, he's present, um, is scoring goals. So yeah, let's go. I, I think we're, we're getting to sort of a combination of players that we had a few years ago with, um, Raya Hatate. Yeah, Ryo Hatate. And, um, who— I, I can't remember the dude's name that was, uh, had like— oh crap, what was it?

Give me the name of a couple of guys that we lost that we, we didn't want to lose. Uh, well, Maeda is gone now. Uh, Nicholas Kuhn. Yeah, Jota is still at the club, he was just injured. He's been injured forever.

Yeah, uh, Kyogo's obviously gone. Has he really been injured that long? Yeah, so he came back after— with a long-term injury. Well, we brought him back to the club February 2025, and then he goes down with an injury early last year. And is finally back in training.

But yeah, yeah, still pretty far away. Um, but yeah, this is the first time I've been excited about a Celtic team since early last year. Yeah, and it's funny that we, that we, we speak that way of this team as we look at some 5 scarves. Here's the thing, we— you and I both know we shouldn't have won the league last year. Yeah, that was some kind of divine intervention.

So that was a great moment, but that team still sucked. Yeah, uh, by Scottish stand— by Celtic in Scotland standards. I think as a Celtic fan, it's okay, it's fine to take the scarf and win the league, but what we would like to see some quality play in between. Yeah, I mean, it's about the way you do it. It's— I will say, unfortunately, it's kind of just a fan of Scottish football.

Celtic dominate in Scotland. No one is gonna argue that, and that's kind of the expectation. Um, even this year, I, I think they're gonna win the league. Rangers don't look very good, and I don't know other teams gonna run them close. Like Hearts did last year.

And maybe in the future Hearts finds their, their way back. I mean, they still have the same ownership and everything, but, um, yeah, I mean, the league is an expectation. What they do beyond that kind of determines how good the season was. Do they win the League Cup, which they didn't do last year? They won, uh, the Scottish Cup, which was great.

They did horrible in Europe. They were smashed out by Kairat Almaty in the Champions League qualifiers and then did basically nothing in the Europa League. Yeah. So I don't know. I think based on the match that was played today, they have a pretty good shot at— so unless you don't, if you disagree, that's fine.

No, I don't. Do you know what the next match setup is going to be for that? Again, the away leg. So it's a 2-leg affair in the playoffs. This is the playoff get into the Champions League, um, which Celtic are notoriously horrible at in playoff scenarios.

So the fact that they won 3-0 tonight against the Austrian champions LASK, um, was more than I ever expected. You texted and, you know, we texted a little bit throughout the match and I said that was pretty much the dream scenario that could have possibly happened Celtic in Europe usually means cartoonishly horrible things happen, or inexplicable things happen in matches, or the wheels fall off. And maybe they do away in Austria next week, but I don't think so. A 3-0 win that we take into the next match, um, is fantastic. Benjamin— well, first off Did you see the beginning of this?

I don't know how much you were watching. Um, I had it on. Okay, so last score in 28 seconds, they put the ball in the back of the net. Luckily it was offside, but 28 seconds goes by before LASK put the ball in the back of the net, and immediately I'm thinking Jesus Christ, we're gonna do it again. We are gonna shit the bed in yet another Champions League playoff.

Um, and LASK almost score like 5 minutes later, and then they have another goal for offside. I think they put the ball in the back of the net like 3 times. Okay. And we're all offside. So that's where I'm like, defense still needs a little help.

But 26 minutes First off, all 3 goals were bangers. 26 minutes in, Benjamin Negren with his contractually obligated 1 goal per game, um, puts in off of a— I think it was a half volley at least— smashes in the goal. Crowd erupts, it's awesome. 12 minutes later, Camilo Durán puts in his first of 2 goals, and then he gets the 3rd and kind of the nail in the coffin in the 67th minute. Camilo Durán looks phenomenal.

He looks like a player that we will probably be able to keep for this season and then sell him for a lot more money, which will end up happening probably if he keeps up this form. But hey, I mean, was he, was he a cheap grab? Like £5 million. We actually got him from, uh, Karabakh in, uh, Azerbaijan of all places. But the reason why he had a bit of a profile was because he scored 5 goals in the Champions League last year with that team.

Um, so he has a knack of scoring in Europe, which he just showed. 2 goals in this one, and he looks phenomenal, and he's fairly young. I think he's only 24. Um, yeah, 24 years old, Colombian. I mean, he is going to be a problem, certainly for domestic opposition, but super exciting result, um, and just very, very happy overall.

Yeah. Good match today. Um, watched it from afar, as I said, on, uh, Univision or one of those. Yeah, I'm surprised you found it. I'm glad you did.

But those guys, they can make anything sound exciting. Yeah, even, even if it's not. But, uh, yeah, good result for Celtic today. Um, yeah. All right, so who is the second team that I think I already know, but your Scottish second team.

My Scottish second team is drum roll. Don't have that yet, but we'll get one.

Kilmarnock. Yeah. Okay. And I guess explain your why here. Okay.

So my task was twofold. Find a kit that I like.

And then I went back to my introduction to this league some 4 years ago. Yeah. And I had some affection for this team early because you can go, if you want to go back to like the second or third podcast, the Killie Pie. Yeah, I, I just, I found some affection for Kilmarnock. So I'm looking at the table, I'm looking at the kits, I'm looking at— I didn't want to choose.

I almost went St. Mirren, honestly. But then I was like, well, don't, don't go so high. Maybe— well, they, they started off well. Yeah, I mean, we're so early. Yeah, we're so early.

This, you Can't really even say that. But yeah, I went back to Kilmarnock. So that's going to be my, my second follow.

John Jewels, I mentioned in the last podcast. So I picked up on a guy that I really like the way he plays. We'll see how that transpires over the course of the season. Right. But yeah, so my second pick.

In the Scottish Premier League is Kilmarnock. And I'm led to believe you have an English team too. I do. Okay, we'll get to that. Um, yeah, just a brief little thing on Kilmarnock.

Um, Killie for short, you'll often hear them referred to. They play in blue and white stripes, which is kind of hard to miss. Rugby Park, um, in Kilmarnock Uh, capacity of about, uh, I believe it's somewhere around 11,000. Um, big rivalry with Ayr United, who of course they just took down in the League Cup. Uh, and major trophies include a, uh, Scottish League title in 1964-65 season.

Um, they have won the Scottish Cup 3 times in 1920, 1929, and as recently as '97. And they have won the Scottish League Cup, uh, 1 time in 2012. They have made the final of that competition, uh, 6 times and have only won the 1, unfortunately. Little, little snakebitten in finals, it would appear.

Um, they've also won the second tier 3 times, including in 2022 when they were promoted. Um, so certainly a club with some history, a little silverware behind them. Um, have been kind of mainstays in the league since they've come up, and I think play relatively exciting football. Not great, uh, defensively this year, it would seem. Maybe they'll figure that out.

But, um, one thing I think you'll find is that with Kilmarnock, they, uh, score a lot of goals. They also concede a lot of goals. So certainly a team if you want to see the ball go in the back of the net, there you go. Yeah, so I, I stand behind my, my choice for them. Um, I will probably explore some kit to, uh, support the team.

I, I'm going to have to buy a couple now, which is fine. Um, yeah, but, uh, looking forward to bringing my second squad to the podcast now. So just to be clear, like, the idea here is that if we don't just watch their game, like, you, you'll watch like the highlights and then explain like what they did that past weekend? Yeah, I'll do do the best I can. I, I have notifications set up, so yeah, I can dip in.

Uh, this is, folks, it's quite time-consuming. It's a part-time role. It is, it is. So I will, I will do my best, but, um, I think it'll bring a little flavor to the cast for each of one of us to have a second team that we watch in both leagues. Yeah, so I will, uh, go with my second team here in the Scottish Premiership, and mine is Motherwell.

I picked Motherwell for a number of reasons. One, I like their kit, similar to you. They play in, uh, I don't know how they would describe it, like yellow and amber It's like a yellow kit with an amber stripe, which always just pops out to me. Very unique kind of, uh, uh, kit. They play at Fir Park in Motherwell, Scotland, uh, in North Lanarkshire, with a capacity of 13,742 seats.

Um, in terms of their history with trophies, they have won One league title in 1932. They've won the Scottish Cup twice, 1952 and 1991. They've won the League Cup one time in 1950. And I don't know what this is, but in 1983 they won the Milk Cup.

Never— I don't know what that is. So maybe I'll come back with more research on the Milk Cup. They have won. I think they also have this ridiculous statistic where they played a long time ago Barcelona in a no. They have it's Barth Barcelona.

I think they've like beaten Barcelona. Let me um. I think they have this ridiculous stat. Hold one sec. Has Motherwell won the Copa del Rey?

Okay, so yeah, I knew they had some stupid stat. So Motherwell has officially, officially unofficially won the Copa del Rey, which is the Spanish Cup. Oh, the Spanish Cup. They won an unofficial postseason edition of the Copa del Rey in 1927. They defeated Real Madrid 3-1 in the final in Madrid and received a special replica trophy donated by King Alfonso VIII.

Okay, so, well, interesting. Yeah, uh, history there. But I like the way they play. They are kind of an exciting team to watch, which is why I picked them. They also have been— they've not been relegated out of the first tier since like the '80s, and they're, you know, not a team that spends a ton of money or anything.

So remarkable stability for a Scottish team. So that's my pick.

All right, excellent. So in the Premier League. Yeah, so we're gonna do a pretty abridged, uh, preview because our recording schedule got fucked and also, uh, just didn't have time. That's fine. And, and I'm looking at the table for this league and have they not played?

No, that's why we're doing a preview. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, so it's the opening weekend this weekend. Uh, Friday kicks off defending champions Arsenal taking on newly promoted Coventry City. Uh, Coventry City are managed by Chelsea legend Frank Lampard.

They have a guy named Haji Wright who United States men's national team fans might know. Uh, the newly promoted teams are Coventry City, who I just said, the Sky Blues, Hull City, the Tigers, Who play in orange and black stripes, if you can believe it. Um, and Ipswich Town are back after a one-year, uh, we'll call it staycation in the Championship. They are back at the first time of asking. Remember, Arsenal won the league last year, uh, fairly comfortably in the end.

Uh, pipping Pep Guardiola's Manchester City. Pep Guardiola is gone from Man City. He left, which is kind of the biggest managerial news probably. So Man City, a new era under Enzo Maresca. And kind of the, the theme of this year is a lot of teams, and a lot of the big teams, have new managers.

Liverpool new manager Andoni Iraola, who they brought in from Bournemouth. Um, Manchester United are sticking with, uh, Michael Carrick, I believe. Yes, who was interim manager last year and finished 3rd with them. So brought him on full-time. Chelsea, new manager— can you believe that?

Xabi Alonso— after they finished 10th. Last year. Newcastle, uh, new manager. Fulham, new manager. Crystal Palace, new manager.

Uh, Tottenham Hotspur brought back Roberto De Zerbi, who finished off the year— and remember, Tottenham were nearly relegated. Um, so interesting to see what happens to Tottenham this year. I think they're a team that are once again going to be very compelling to watch, maybe not for all the right reasons. West Ham, Burnley, Wolves, all relegated last year, so you can say goodbye to them. Um, it's gonna be a fun year.

I do think Arsenal are not heavy, heavy favorites to win the league, but they are certainly the comfortable favorites to repeat as champions. I just think the theme here is that the big teams sans Arsenal are all kind of in a new era with either new managers or a lot of new players. And with that brings uncertainty and maybe lack of stability that Arsenal will very much have, um, which leads me to think that Arsenal are gonna win the title again this year if I had to pick. But some interesting matchups on the first weekend. I already mentioned The kickoff is Arsenal versus the new boys, Coventry City.

I'm looking forward to Saturday's slate. Hull open up their campaign against Man United. Um, Brentford and Tottenham, an interesting little London clash there. The big one is probably Sunday, Newcastle taking on Liverpool. Liverpool, of course, with a new boss.

So does Newcastle, which is why many teams have a new boss.

Um, so I think Arsenal are going to win the league, but the rest of the league is very, very wide open. So I will posit this to you: perhaps we should save our second team Premier League reveal for the next pod. I mean, it's up to you. What do you say? Do you want to save it?

I don't care. Um, I think that'll give us a chance to discuss the 2 teams that we picked. Okay. Um, we're coming up on the hour, so, uh, if you're good with saving that choice until the next pod, I am. It's fine with me.

Okay. So super lightning round, uh, um, preview of the Premier League, but we're gonna have matches to discuss in the Premier League next time we come, and I will definitely add more flavor to the teams and kind of give more of a perspective. Obviously a ton of transfers, ins and outs and all of that, but basically with the World Cup and then we have lost a little bit of the, the normal routine. That just wasn't gonna happen. So, um, I think that'll do it for this show though.

Yeah. And then, uh, stay tuned for our second club picks. Oh boy, in the Premier League. Yeah, we have— once again, we'll have a shitload to discuss. IndyCar, F1, Premier League kicks off, Scottish football as well.

So yeah, packed slate, lots to do, lots to do. All right, well, with that, I think we'll get going. All right, for executive producer Richard Tanaka.

This has been Tackling the Chicane. Copyright 2026, Studio 2520.

We will see you next time.